So, you may have noticed that last update, it was the start of summer, and I had announced there would be more art re uploads, and new stuff, and a revival of my Youtube channel.

And then I vanished into the void without further updates or any changes to anything.

What happened?

I don't bring it up much since it usually isn't relevant, but I do have family.

Up until recently, it's been the five of us at my parents- my mom and dad, naturally, but also me, my younger sister Gabby, and my older sister, Kaitlin (and the cats, of course.)

Kaitlin is severely disabled- she was born very early, had severe scoliosis to the point of requiring rods in her back, she's deaf in one ear and has difficulties speaking that make it hard for others to understand her and difficulty walking(and probably a few things I forgot because it's a lot.)

But that's not usually what I think about when I think of her.

I know her as the girl who loves Disney and Carebears and Strawberry Shortcake and all the things she grew up with in the 80's. I think of her love with penguins, and flamingos, and ostriches, and how she always has a Beanie Baby Stretch by her side. How her favorite color is purple, and how we have Pizza Night every Friday because it's her favorite, and how much she loves cheesecake.

That she's a big fan of Looney Toons and old cartoons, and spends her time doing coloring books or watching Youtube or browsing the web.

How she loved going out to eat at diners and restaurants and how happy she was when we found another Ihop after the local one closed.

How even though she wasn't what one usually expected a "big sister" to be like, she was generous, and kind, and caring.

This summer, Kaitlin became very sick and was brought to the hospital. A visit for a suspected blockage turned into a stay that became a hysterectomy, and what was supposed to be a few days in hospital to recover from that turned into a massive series of complications.

This lead to the addition of a feeding tube, a tracheotomy, and a seemingly endless array of tubes and equipment, most of which also had issues.

Procedures suggested to be "temporary" were in fact long term or "maybe never" to be removed. The nurses were wonderful, but much of the staff communicated poorly with us and with each other, compounding issues and adding to our emotional distress. Two seizures, multiple cases of pneumonia, many infections and several further surgeries later, and they discovered an esophageal fistula that was somehow missed during all of the procedures that passed through that area to fix those stupid tubes.

Our options were putting her through yet another surgery (to replace the affected area with a bag, )which she might not even survive, then have her be unable to eat normally for around half year,( and *maybe* get the bag removed in another procedure that she might *also* not survive, or get severe complications from,) or to put her on palliative care and let her fade away.

We chose the latter, and at 9:30 on October 4th, Kaitlin passed away, bringing an end to nearly five months of misery.

(Additionally, my sister Gabby's cat, Paris ,(Neptune's sister) passed away-albeit peacefully- in the middle of all this going on.)

We're not in great financial shape.

This isn't what I wanted to have to post, let alone how I wanted the start of Spooky Month to be, but we have a GoFundMe for my sister's funeral expenses.

Any amount would help, and it's okay if you can't- I know times are tough all around.

https://gofund.me/cbcb0b1b

<div class="gfm-embed" data-url="https://www.gofundme.com/f/memorial-for-kaitlin/widget/large?sharesheet=CAMPAIGN_PAGE&attribution_id=undefined"></div><script defer src="https://www.gofundme.com/static/js/embed.js"></script>

GoFundMe Link

As for here, on Newgrounds, for those wondering, there will be updates.

I will get back into posting, and I will revive my Youtube- though admittedly I will be focusing more on things I can get up on the shops due to aforementioned financial situation.

It will be a moment though, due to sadness and also this stupid cold I got this week because I apparently can not know peace.

But on a happier note, my little sister Gabby put out her EP Bones in the Backyard, and I am very proud, so feel free to give it a listen.

I hope Kaitlin is proud of her, too.

https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=OLAK5uy_l_n5kNSl_1wwTpd-lTPAzeBk8Gxu2DjRA

https://open.spotify.com/album/43feke2ligZUV7BYYlSc0s